for a gay guy, i think i play too much of video games. but i have an excuse! i started off as a nerdy one. i was the king (or queen) of word processing. i used to help my paired partner during computer class. everyone had to type out boring passages of various compositions we wrote by hand and then get them printed. which kinda defeats the purpose of writing it out in the first place right? but i was really nice to my partner (a sweet girl of demure nature, by the way) and i would help out type out both mine and hers. maybe i just enjoyed hogging the computer. which adds to the credibility of my nerdy nature. that was during my primary school days. then i started progressing on to become phallic-oriented during secondary school. Ah!!! the sweet innocence of youth. i accidentally discovered the thrill of cruising in the shopping mall toilets near my home. i was taking a crap and there were glory holes someone burned into the cubical walls. needless to say, i started out gay the wrong way. normally people would realize that they were not interested in girls and stuff like that. but i discovered the joys of gay sex then proceeded on to discover my sexuality. eventually abandoning the grottoes of the female privates toward the end of secondary 2. eventually i attained full-fledged gay status during secondary three. that was the period of online dating through gay personals and meeting up with other people of similar nature through chatrooms and more toilet fun. and now, i follow the 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' policy at work. though outside of work, it's more like 'Even If You Don't Ask, You'll Still Be Able to Tell'.

so you see, my history of gayhood is really warped. but still, my roots are with the nerdy ones. i enjoy going on for hours with fellow video gamers about topics such as HP, MP, secret levels and how to go about getting the strongest weapon early in the game. it's getting hard to pull off the nerd thing though. given that i have practically no knowledge of Java, any know-how of the Adobe range of products, or even the difference between XP and Vista, i ought to be condemned to just being gay. ok lah, give myself a discount. a preppy gay dude.

this is why i so enjoy playing the latest installment of Squaresoft's Final Fantasy series. i've been an ardent fan of Final Fantasy since i discovered it on my big bulky gameboy during primary school. i remember Final Fantasy Three where the characters were cute little things with spiky hair. and the enemies appeared in block formation during the turn-based battles. and the music came out in beeps and bops and slashes and bangs. and the storyline was oh-so-innocent with the clear lines drawn between who the good and bad guys were. evil looked evil. and the good looked really dashing. though i can assure you it's hard to tell good-looking from the fugly in less than 50 pixels on a gameboy screen.

look at how far Final Fantasy has come now. the characters are so life-like that you can even see everything from their japanese manga-styled hiar, the colour of their unnatural eyes (yellow irises) or even their crotches. as much as i wish i could believe the theory that the bigger their crotches, the more likely they are the good guys, it's not true. Final Fantasy XII is the gayest in the series. half of the men in the game are in various forms of undress. maybe it's the climate where the game exists in (tropical forest to scorching deserts), but there's not much excuse for a character to go around in a sleeveless top which has the abdomen area opened permanently, all 6 glorious abs exposed for the gay world to see. and curiously, most guys in the world of FFXII wear a g-string for some reason. and not inside, but OUTSIDE their pants.

not that i'm complaining. yum.

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